I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
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