I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
maybe you met your husband and you just don't know it yet
and other hilarious jokes you can tell yourself
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