my grandmother thought she vaccuumed up a quarter so she made me open the bag, dump it out on her front lawn, and dig through it. no quarter.
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
I just blew my weed a kiss
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
You had me at "let me see your balls"
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
