And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
People With No Siblings Will Never Understand These 23 Things
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
25 Seemingly Normal Things That Give Some People Massive Anxiety
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong