i wish starbucks made bloody marys
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
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