if i die, you can have my worn out liver and american apparel deep v's.sell the liver to a chinese restaurant
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
awoke with 47 plastic lawn flamingos in my bed and on surrounding floor. explanation?
you said they were your minions of evil that protected you from ferrets.
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
Randomize
