weddingsv make me drug and hornr
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
Randomize
