you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Randomize
