i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
That was an excessively violent trivia night
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
My liver appreciates your vow of avoiding matrimony
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
Randomize
