Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Welcome to texting with Mike. You're now leaving the sober section and headed to our insanely high bad decision making portion of mike. Enjoy the trip.
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
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