Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
I just gift wrapped bread.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
Randomize