i lost my phone in the process of getting a condom out of my hair
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
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