HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
You said too many real things and now I need to crawl back inside my protective fort of sarcasm, being an asshole, and sass
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
Randomize
