My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize
