This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
Randomize
