do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
anyone who says having children is the best experience of their life obviously has never seen a vending machine carry vodka in Capri sun pouches.
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
Randomize
