Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
I have feelings that need drinking.
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
Randomize