Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
sarcasm needs its own font
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
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