Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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