all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
I just sent an "I'm sorry I forged a prescription in your name" email. It was one of the more awkward things I've done this week.
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
Randomize
