You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
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