I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
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He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
I just faked an interview like I fake a fucking orgasm. Wonder if these candidates can tell I'm a tired and hungover recruiter?
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
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I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night