My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
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