So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
Sexting Captain while emailing my eharmony match about my low key weekend is hard.
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
Randomize
