i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
my penis made a compromise with my morals
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