I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
I'm at the laundry mat. This guy is here showing me his ankle monitor. The weird ones always find me.
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
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