Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
well most of my day revolves around power hour
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
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