Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
I just ate a dove chocolate and the wrapper said "chocolate: always your valentine" WHAT KIND OF JACKASS WRITES THESE AND WHY MUST THEY MOCK ME?
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
Randomize
