what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
Randomize
