Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
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