so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
I just set up a proportion to calculate how much Jolly Rancher vodka I can make with the limited amount of Jolly Ranchers I have. Finally, real-life application of math.
Do you remember whose house we're in?
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
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