I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
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