You know you have a problem when you walk into your bathroom find kettle one in your shower and a note you wrote yourself when drunk that says "panties at jared leto's" on your counter
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
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I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
Contents of my pockets this morning: phone, condom, one hoop earring, half a cheeseburger, lighter and a $87 receipt from tacobell. Time for work.
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
Let me set the mood for you. Do you remember Britney Spears in her Hit Me Baby One More Time era? Well I just fucked this college girl I shit you not her name is Persephone and she looks exactly like Britney Spears back when she was hot. I might be in love.
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