You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
My ex's psycho new girlfriend found my vibrator I forgot at his place. Apparently she didn't find it as funny as I did. 😂
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
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