I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
I need moral support for this bender
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Randomize
