How did I get so drunk? We had to fish that girl out of the Goodwill Donation Box.
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
My dermatologist just asked me, "what happened here?" referring to the bruising on my nipples. I told her I walked into a door. Thanks for that awkward moment.
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
Randomize
