I bet he comes in French.
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
I feel like I got hit by a truck. And I vaguely remember getting into an argument with a passive aggressive Ron Burgundy in a onesie- grown man, not a baby- about the pronunciation of New Orleans
Randomize
