woke up on my stairs with half a hot dog beside me and the last text I sent was "i make hot dog in toasTer" .
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
Randomize
