I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
So for his birthday I'm planning on doing what stripper did when she put the matches on her nipples..lights them n makes him blow them out..SEE I AM dating material.
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
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Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
WTF was I supposed to tell them? "hi mom and dad, this is some rando I met on the internet. please ignore the noises that will be coming from my bedroom for the next 60-90 minutes. kthxbye."
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
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