I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
How naked do you want me to be?
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