I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
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