He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
Drunk is a universal language darling
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
Randomize