What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
How I know that I'm single: when I get a save the date for a wedding & I read "& guest" my first thought was does my bottle of Jack Daniels count.
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Randomize
