Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
Randomize
