i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Randomize
