are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
Randomize
