What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
Walk of shaming dressed as a zombie hunter. This hangover feels like the actual apocalypse.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
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