at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
I'm sobbing to NWA
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
Randomize