fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
She was giving me a handjob while I was wearing a sombrero with a beer in one hand and a hammer in the other.
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
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