She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
Dave called me blind fucking drunk thinking he was going to die from drinking with drake bell(wtf?) saying "it's all that drake motherfucker's fault" and later proceeded to tell me "you are my twitter"
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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